Somebody has a lot of time to sit around drinking beer and thinking about this stuff. Funny. VISIT THE WEBSITE.
Showing posts with label funny. Show all posts
Showing posts with label funny. Show all posts
Thursday, June 25, 2009
99 Ways to Open a Beer Bottle Without a Bottle Opener
Somebody has a lot of time to sit around drinking beer and thinking about this stuff. Funny. VISIT THE WEBSITE.
Monday, June 22, 2009
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Fondling in Bed
After 20 years of marriage, a couple was lying in bed one evening when the wife felt her husband begin to fondle her in ways he hadn't in some time.
It almost tickled as his hands started at her neck and then began moving down past the small of her back.
He then caressed her shoulders and her neck, slowly working his hand down over her breasts, stopping just over her lower stomach.
He then proceeded to place his hand on her left inner arm, caressed past the side of her breast again, working down her side, passed gently over her buttock and down her leg to her calf. Then, he proceeded up her inner thigh, stopping just at the innermost portion of her upper leg. He continued in the same manner on her right side, then suddenly stopped, rolled over, and started to watch TV.
As she had become quite aroused by this caressing, she asked in a loving voice, "That was wonderful. Why did you stop?"
He said, "I found the remote."
The International Center for Bathroom Etiquette
VISIT THE WEBSITE where you can learn about General Urinal Etiquette , Bathroom Etiquette at Home , Workplace Bathroom Etiquette , Women’s Bathroom Issues and much more.
Saturday, June 20, 2009
T-shirt Hell
These guys have some of the funniest T-shirts I've ever seen. Be sure to check out their section on baby and toddler shirts, too. Meanwhile, here are a few samples:
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
Fun Toilet Paper(s)
Did you know that before the daily newspaper was printed, corn cobs were the material of choice for wiping your butt? Ouch! Thank god we live in the modern age! Not only do we have soft and absorbent toilet paper, but now you can buy it with nicely decorated designs! This will make it even more pleasing for the 60% of you that look at the paper after you wipe! Each print appears throughout the whole roll!
VISIT THIS WEBSITE FOR MORE INFO ON THE TOILET PAPERS
 Income Tax Return Toilet Paper |  Conserve Toilet Paper |  Toxic Waste Toilet Paper |
 Black Toilet Paper |  Asswipes Toilet Paper |  Ruler Toilet Paper |
 $100 Bill Toilet Paper |  Barbed Wire Toilet Paper |  Game Over Toilet Paper |
 Mightysoft Windoos Toilet Paper |  Rebel Confederate Flag Toilet Paper |  Retro Instructions Toilet Paper |
 Wet Fart Toilet Paper |  Bush Toilet Paper |  Golf Toilet Paper |
VISIT THIS WEBSITE FOR MORE INFO ON THE TOILET PAPERS
Monday, June 1, 2009
Saturday, May 30, 2009
Rune's Barf Bag Collection
Rune's Barf Bag Collection now exhibits 1289 different bags from 481 airlines in 133 countries!
"What sounds to be one of the most disgusting sites on the web is actually one of the funniest. A comprehensive collection of "barf bags" from airlines worldwide, this site has pictures and descriptions for each one (none are shown used). If you've ever been curious about the world of the barf bag, this is the place for you!" -- Boscoplace "Superior Design Award" April 2000
A featured "barf bag story":
It was about 1968. I was third man in the cockpit on an Eastern Airlines Lockheed 1011 (2nd officer). David was pilot and Charles was 1st officer(copilot). Diana was a new (just graduated) stewardess (cabin attendant). It was an early morning flight from St. Louis to some East Coast city I can't recall, probably New York or Boston.
Once we were in the air, David picked up the public announcing handset and announced "Cabin attendant to the cockpit, please." Diana showed up and David said "The 1st officer is not feeling well, would you please bring us a sick bag."
She left, and returned with a bag. David said thank you, and she returned to the passenger cabin.
David took the bag and poured into it the contents of a can of Campbell's concentrated vegetable soup, which he had opened with the can opener on his pocket knife. A few minutes later, he again called for the cabin attendant.
Diana arrived, and he gave her the full bag and said "Please dispose of this." She took the bag and began to leave. She was a step or two out of the cockpit when David said "Wait a minute, bring that back."
She brought the bag back, and David took it, opened it and looked inside. Then he said " Boy, this looks pretty good" and dipped his hand into the bag, pulled out some of the contents and ate it.
Diana then barfed big time, but since she had not brought a bag for herself, she barfed all over David and Charles.
There is a moral here, but I don't know what it is.
Rob
VISIT THIS WEBSITE
Friday, May 29, 2009
Drew Carey Can't Stop Laughing at 69 Bid on The Price is Right
A nice man named Dr. Bummer who happens to be a gynecologist from Pittsburgh had a winning bid of $69 and we have no idea why Drew Carey started laughing hysterically. You know, he's just way too immature to replace our beloved Bob Barker. That's right, he must be laughing in heaven...wait...he's not dead yet...Disregard!!!
CREDIT TO: "You Gotta See This Video!"
CREDIT TO: "You Gotta See This Video!"
Saturday, May 23, 2009
Thursday, May 21, 2009
Monday, May 18, 2009
Clench Your Anus 100 Times a Day and Say Goodbye to Depression
AUTHOR'S DESCRIPTION: "I think constricting anus 100 times and denting navel 100 times in succession everyday is effective to good-bye depression and take back youth. You can do so at a boring meeting or in a subway. I have known 70-year-old man who has practiced it for 20 years. As a result, he has good complexion and has grown 20 years younger. His eyes sparkle. He is full of vigor, happiness and joy. He has neither complained nor born a grudge under any circumstance. Furthermore, he can make love three times in succession without drawing out.
In addition, he also can have burned a strong beautiful fire within his abdomen. It can burn out the dirty stickiness of his body, release his immaterial fiber or third attention which has been confined to his stickiness. Then, he can shoot out his immaterial fiber or third attention to an object, concentrate on it and attain happy lucky feeling through the success of concentration.
If you don't know concentration which gives you peculiar pleasure, your life looks like a hell."
About the Author: Hiroyuki Nishigaki, a graduate of Osaka City University in 1963, resides in Japan. He was employed by the Kyodo News Agency until 1976. He is the author of four books in Japanese, including How to Attain Silent Knowledge, and the author of one book in English Rejuvenation and Unveiled Hidden Phenix.
The Amazon.com page for this book (yes, it's real) also has some hilarious reader reviews.
World's Largest Collection of Navel Lint
Certifiable by the Guiness Book of World Records
Wow. From the guy himself: "Some people gaze into their navel for inspiration: I look into mine and see navel fluff. Also known as navel lint, it is that fascinating fluffy substance that forms mysteriously in the belly buttons of special people. I've been collecting navel fluff (just my own) since 1984, and upon learning of this, people usually ask "Why?". To this I answer "Why not?". In my mind, the worth of any collection depends on the following factors..."
SEE THE WEBSITE TO BELIEVE IT.
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